Forum Game: Jokes!

Tell a joke that you think is the funniest one you've got! Here's mine:
In the jungle, all the animals were talking about the lion's birthday. He was the king. The lion announced, "As you know, today is my birthday. Bring me some nice food. If it's something that hurts my teeth, I'll shove it up your butt!" Scared, all the animals in the jungle rushed to get something. He got fruits, vegetables, human candy, etc. Then, a squirrel comes up with some nuts. The lion bites, and roars in pain.
"I warned you!", shouted the lion. He grabs a nut, and starts shoving it into the squirrel's rear end. Inexplicably, the squirrel starts to laugh uncontrollably.
"What the hell," said the confused lion, "Why are you laughing? This should feel excruciating for you!"
Finally, the squirrel regains his composure, and says, wiping a tear from his eyes, "The monkey brought coconuts!"

 

I have two jokes: my life
Second joke: your hairline was the main character in Lost

 

Here's mine. prepare to laugh your arses off

"One day, there was a Yum, but he was a noob"

HAHAHAHHAH ITS FUNNY CAUSE THAT WOULD NEVER EXIST AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAH

 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH I SEE WHAT YOU DID DERE

 

BEST. JOKE EVER

 

TYTYTYTY

 

Once upon a time, this story ended

 

I made this one up in Year 4, yes, me, the first person I told it to was my head-teacher. <-Not one of past me's best decisions.
What is the difference between Snowmen and Snow-women? Snowballs.

 

That's genius

 

The real kicker is that I made it up 8 years ago, yet everyone else on the internet uses it without my GOD GIVEN RIGHT OF PERMISSIONS YOU FONGING IDIOTS STOP STEALING MY JOKES!!!!!!

 

That escalated quickly

 

Whats the story in balamory would you like to know

 

i was gonna tell a joke about pizza but it was too cheesey.

 

Once at the time there was a Revelutions and he used Huzuni


HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH CANT HAPPEN ASWELL

 

I got 3 jokes!
My 1st joke!: a panda walked in a pub. He asked for a sandwich. When he got it he ate it, shot the barman and left. The next day the police find out it was the panda and bring him to the crime scene. The policeman asks him, "why'd u do that?" So the panda said, "it's what I do go look me up in a dictionary"
So, the policeman looked him up and it said: Panda Bear. From China. Eats shoots and leaves.
After the panda said," see, I eat,shoot and leave!"
My second joke: a man walked into a bar. Ouch!
My third joke: what did the squirall say when the bird stole his nuts he stored all summer. "Ouch. Someone just pinched my nuts!"

 

All of the jokes I have immature even for this forum

 

If you want a place to tell them, go on Squadcraft and type /server factions

 

But I'll get banned due to the apparently exceptional moderating! lol, sorry for lying and thx 4 advice.

 

lol

 

I have a racist and inappropriate joke. I'll just say, it involves the Mexican, The Black dude, and the Asian.

 

The urge is to tempting.

 

Racist Joke Time ------------------------------------------------------ whats The Deference between a Mexican and a bench------------------------- A bench can support a family-------------------- ooooooooooooooooo shit that was rude dude ....

 

A bench can support any family except yours OWWWWWW DOUBLE DISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

 

shrekt

 

i cri (FUCK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSSY)

 

Yo mama so dark she went to night school and was marked absent

Yo mama so dark that she can leave fingerprints on charcoal

YO mama so hairy the only language she speaks is wookie

Yo mama so ugly that not even goldfish crackers smile back

Yo Mama's so nasty, she went swimming and made the Dead Sea

 

#ImmuturityFTW

 

Yo mama so hairy she has afros on her breasts

 

Sushsl

 

Yo mama so fat she got baptized in Sea World

Yo mama so stupid she starved to death in a grocery store

Yo mama so stupid she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl

 

XD i love YO mama jokes